I Love Yous Are for White People Essay

In the book I Love Yous Are for White People Lacs quest for acceptance takes him through an brutal journey to acquire self wonder and acceptance. The author Lac Su navigates through his childhood and adolescence seeking an extraordinary desire for bang, acceptance and functioning he has been deprived from by his family. During his journey, Lac attempts to gain acceptance by friends and family, no matter what the consequences be. Lac Sus upbringing was with erupt much love and nurturing. His father was abusive, physically and mentally.For seemingly menial issues Lac would get a beating, one of those examples would be when he would get homework answers wrong. His father would cinch anything that he could get his hands on to beat him. Lac stated that his father would grab the plastic rod from the mini blinds, a spatula, a rice bowl, a fishing rod, my notebook, a radio antenna, a wooden yard stick, and a burbot handle before settling on an extension cord as his weapon of choice. (p62). Lac clearly was beaten often his home life did not entangle any love, rather physical assaults and degradation. The impact of the blows grow dull and impersonal I feel less of each new layer he adds to the wounds. (113) out-of-pocket to the horrid amount of beatings Lac Su would have to endure, he created a surreal world when it came to his home life. He learned to cope with the pain and impersonalize it in order for him to aim it through the mental and physical abuses. Lac really had no other way to cope with the abuse besides impersonalizing it. He disassociated himself from his pain both physically and internally ascribable to the psychological absence from his family.Being a human being and needing some sort of approval, he sought subsequently the love and attention he desperately craved for outside of his home. Outside of his home, Lac was able-bodied to exercise his other faculties which eventually made him feel more human, more loved and genuine.. He compensat e the lack of feeling numb therefore, he took the necessary consequences to feel more alive. Trying to gain a friend was one way to fulfill Lacs need for acceptance and love. Lacs desperate desire for a friend had him take drastic measures such as stealing.He would steal money from his parents shote bank even though he knew that they were financially struggling. He was isolated from his family and the real world therefore, he attempted to buy his way into a blood I think Im almost there. Last week, Javi brought me over to his house to show me his basketball card collection. His mother even made me a bean burrito and homemade horchata. Im also hanging out with him at school every day. Javi lets me cut in line at lunch, and he always picks me to be on his team when we play socco and his team always wins.After a long cold winter of solitude it feels identical things are warming up it feels like I belong. (108) The acceptance of Lac from Javi gave Lac a sentiency of belonging. H e felt belonging when he would be picked by Javi to be on his team and also due to Javi hanging out with Lac at school. Before Javi, Lac had no friends at all to hang out with, he felt like a looser. Javi provided Lac with his friendship however, this came at a price. Lac could care less. When I have money, were playing Spy Hunter. I dont principal because Javis reliance on my money gives the impression that were tight. (94) The sense of belonging even if it pertained to Lacs money was much more than the lack of love and enjoy Lac was receiving at home. To Lac the entirely important thing was gaining a friend who somehow portrayed a sense love and belonging. In this case, Javi would hang out with Lac at school, take Lac to his house, pick him to be on his team all in return for Lacs funding of his games. Lac also made friends with a boy whose way name is Frog. Frogs older brothers are in a gang called the Kingsley Street Gang.The Kingsley Street Gang intimidates Lac however, thei r acknowledgement of Lac makes him feel accepted. Despite my insecurity, nothing bad ever happens to me when Im around them, except for the occasional racist jokes aimed in my direction. But even the teasing makes me feel accepted. (85) Lacs insecurities came from not being able to adapt with the American norms. His family did not help him to adapt kinda, they made him feel isolated by not being there for him. His father did not underpin Lac which caused Lac to have to deal with his insecurities on his own. Lac knows that the Kingsley Street Gang boys are intimidating for numerous reasons.Their tattoos, their macho ttitude and outfits however, even being around these people does not go against Lac to be friends with them due to their acknowledgement of Lac. Since Lac was unable to get the acceptance of his father, he finds a substitute in the Kingsley Street Boys. Their acknowledgement gives Lac a sense of acceptance, love and fulfills some of his desires. The reason he also lik es hanging out with the Kingsley Street Gang is because of some form of protection Lac is trying to have. The Kingsley Street Gang is consisted of boys who olfactory perception tough and act as if they are not scared of anything they somewhat resemble Lacs father.Lac could be seeking protection from these boys in the gang due to the physical and mental abuse he has to go through on a daily bases. In some ways these boys gave Lac the opportunity to feel accepted however, Lac was never able to open up to these boys and have a close relationship with them. This was because they did not have many commonalities culturally. They did not understand where Lac was coming from, instead of being there for him they would make racist jokes due to not understanding what Lac was really going through. I cant believe it Dragon oral sex is actually talking to me.He is approaching me because of the one thing Ive never done in publicspeak Vietnamese. (139) Dragon boss is a leader of a gang called t he Street Ratz. Lac immediately bonded with Dragon Head due to their resemblingities. They both are Vietnamese, speak the language and have the same background. It was only natural that Lac would try to be a part of the Street Ratz due to the commonalities he had with them and for the acceptance he desperately was searching for. The Street Ratz have treated me like family, even though Im not a member of their graffiti gang. Its comforting to have peers with the same interests. (156)The Street Ratz mum where Lac was coming from culturally therefore, the way they interacted with Lac was more common to Lac and this made him fit in. In some ways they knew what his family life was like and they too sought after love and acceptance, and the way they found it was by from forming a gang and being there for each other. Due to their commonalities the bond Lac shared with boys especially with Dragon Head was very strong. I dont even know where to begin telling Dragon Head what keeps me up a t night. But I sense he understands me anyways. (162)Both Dragon Head and Lac understood each other clearly, no words needed to be said. They both were going through similar issues. Through the Street Ratz Lac was able to escape his physical and mental abuse. He felt like that for once he truly fits in and that others understand where he is coming from. This also came at a price, the Street Ratz had bad reputations. For the acceptance, Lac was battling between being a part of the gang or doing the right thing and acquiring out. He was unable to escape from the love and acceptances the Street Ratz were providing him with.This was the reason Lac was involved in a few vile crimes which he was unable to get out of due to his unrestrained connection and acceptance from the Street Ratz. Not only did Lac try to seek acceptance outside of his home but also, he act to be accepted by his father. The real poverty is inside my house where I go to bed hungry most nights, where Im edacious fo r affection, and where my fathers unpredictable anger has us walking on eggshells. (81) The lack of affection from Lacs father was making Lac crave it even more.He needed the assurance of his father, the love and affection from him however, he never got it. Instead he would get beatings due to his fathers unstable stage of mind and his unawareness on how to be a father. I dont know quite what being smart is in his eyes, but I necessity to be that for him. (62) Lac clearly tried to be exactly what his father wanted him to be. Being abused by his father clearly had nothing to do with what Lac was doing. He tried to be a good boy, he tried because he wanted to fulfill the emptiness he was feeling due to the lack of emotional connection he had with his father.Lacs fathers physical and mental abuse was the root cause of Lacs low self esteem and for his desire to belong and to be accepted by others. If Lac would have received the affection he deserved as a child, his intense journey to acquire self love and acceptance would not have led him to befriend people who were bad influences in his life. Lac would have thrived in school and in life without having to make abominable mistakes. Like many abused children, Lac Su may live his life always trying to please others for acceptance and love which he was lacking in his childhood.